Thursday, November 23, 2006

Juvenile Delinquents

At what age does one stop being a "juvenile" delinquent? I'm not talking about me, by the way. This is the "eventful Saturday night" I mentioned in my "Rock Chick" post. While I was rocking out in a village hall with respectable middle aged business men, much to my Nan's dismay (and hilarity) one of her other grandchildren spent the night in the cells. She despairs, and bemoans we should got out together and find some kind of happy medium, instead of the two extremes!

Are you sitting comfortably? Then I'll begin at the beginning.

Due to my hot date with a microphone last Saturday, I was unable to attend the last minute night out for my twin cousin's 21st. (know here as J & C). How glad I now am that this was the case. However, those who did accompany them included their sister (V), her betrothed (A), J's long-suffering girlfriend C-B, and an old classmate of mine (K). Warning: the story that follows was heard through the grapevine, and may bear little or no resemblance to actual events. (Especially since some of the above witnesses may have been under the influence of alcohol at the time.) I do not mean to offend anyone!

As the night out progressed, at one particular venue, J & C nagged bar staff to be served at a non-service part of the bar, (I've never understood non-service areas. What is the point?!) which was assumed to be aggressive behavior by the power-tripping bouncers. J, being blessed/cursed with the gift of the gab, managed to talk himself and many of his party into getting a good kicking by said bouncers, not a fight, you understand, as the only punch thrown by "our" side was by K, the shy, girly classmate of mine. Brother in law to be, A, received a lovely black eye, and J simply had lots of random bruising.

Out on the street by now, V spotted my sister walking by the venue, and shouted hello, to be greeted with a hurried goodbye and retreat by my sister, ever practical, not wanting to involve herself! Police arrived, and bundled J into a van after he pushed poor C-B to the floor in his flurry of actions.

Copper: (to C-B) "Do you want to press charges?"
C-B: "Damn right I do!"

*passage of time in which to think...*

C-B: "I've changed my mind, will he be ok? What is going to happen to him?"
Copper: "Don't worry, luv, we'll probably just let him out round the corner and caution him...."

*Van starts violently rocking from side to side*

Copper: "Sorry, luv, looks like he'll be in for the night now."

Talk about bad timing WRT sticking to the man.

Poor J got some real stick for it on Sunday afternoon at the family buffet we had. He was the butt of every joke! Luckily, he had quite the sense of humor. As irony would have it, his mother had recently started volunteering to go round the cells in the mornings to ear-bash the young juveys. Can you imagine the look on his hungover face if his mum had greeted him the morning after the night before???



At 10:05 am , Anonymous Anonymous said...

Just excellent, ur humour shines on thru :0) luv from a student ambassador from Burnley x


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